PARENTING PARALYSIS

As I scrolled through news headlines, I noticed many of the articles were related to parenting.  I started paying closer attention to the topics and read a bit of some of the articles.  It wasn’t long before I was confused.  I read one piece of advice and thought, wait, the last article said the opposite.  The amount of conflicting information was overwhelming!  We can get so overloaded with information that we just don’t know what to think or do – leading to Parenting Paralysis.

So how do we wade through all the input to decide what’s best for our kids?  Here are a few thoughts based on my 30 years of experience working with children and families:

1.  Take parenting advice with a grain of salt.   Experts and influencers may have some good ideas but remember that you know your child and family best.  There’s nothing wrong with trying different approaches or techniques but kids need consistency and predictability so find what works for you and stick to it.
2. You have to be genuine.  Some of the approaches provide scripts and encourage parents to speak to their kids in a very specific way.  This can be helpful if we’re not sure where to start, just make sure it’s consistent with you and your family values, etc.  If you relate to your kids one way and turn around and relate to everyone else in a very different way, kids will notice.  Consider trying a few new phrases to see how it feels to you and how your child responds.
3. Kids need boundaries and clear expectations as well as responsibility and opportunities to make age-appropriate choices.  Make sure whatever approach you use includes these.
4. You know your child best – trust your instincts.  Kids can’t always clearly express what they want or need so they rely on you to do what’s best for them.  This means we need to listen and pay attention to our kids, and we need to know ourselves.
5. The most important thing you bring to your relationship with your child is you!  Trust that if you love your child and make the best decisions you can in the moment, you child will be just fine.

If you still feel stuck and unsure about your parenting or if you’re concerned about your child, it may be time to ask for help.  I love helping parents get a handle on things and find joy in parenting again.  Call me for a free consultation.